Another day starts in my Femdom FLR life.

I have been reading blogs again here on wordpress, Well I should say I have been using the crappy search tool trying to find other Femdom or FLR sites I have not seen yet. I found one more, it is new, there is only one post so far. I do hope they continue it.

I think FLR and Femdom are different. I am more Femdom because I use my husbands sexual desire to benefit my self and my family. I am at the controls of a complicated machine, so to speak. Sex is almost always in the motivation on both sides

FLR you are like a boss to your husband, you may control his sex but your mindset is generally that you are more qualified to make all decisions regarding your life together. There may or may not be sex involved.

I have some followers that are new to the lifestyle like I was in the beginning, commenting and questioning just trying to find their way. Very open and honest questions.

I am so glad they stumbled across my blog. I love my circle of friends here, I hope they stay on and join us.

In the beginning when sub asked me to change roles I started looking at what this was about. I see now that when I searched for Femdom mostly what I found was information on Feminizing males, BDSM or professional Dominatrix Women.

Not anything about 24/7 marriage with the Wife controlling everything in her household with a man she loves and respects.

Several of the comments I receive are from people looking for one of the topics I found above, but not really about 24/7 Femdom.

For instance, my relationship with my husband is not only about the act of sex, it is about the day in day out life of a household. Most women know all that is involved here, I don’t think most men do. I think most households, the woman does most of the tasks while the husband may sit around like a superior feeling it is Her work. Really? Yes unfortunately a true statement.

In my Femdom/FLR I see now I am a hybrid both disciplines are melded together.

One thing I was thinking about is when I am home I throw on sweats or old pajama bottoms, a baggy shirt and sweatshirt. Hardy anything sexy, I do not own any stilettos, latex, whips, etc. Well I do own a strap-on. Anyway the point is I Dominate my husband in plain clothes, no special attire. When our sexual sessions happen, he is pleasing me, I am not working on arousing him or entertaining him, it is about me being satisfied, the byproduct of course is he is being satisfied by satisfying me.


28 thoughts on “More on my normal life

  1. Hi D.

    (I have probably written about this before) There was a time when FLR was just a type of Femdom: a long-term, loving, monogamous, 24/7 D/s Femdom relationship. The term FLR was meant to indicate that it wasn’t a casual play relationship or only in the bedroom.

    At some point when I took a break from blogging (2013 to early 2015), FLR changed its implications and a new movement rose up around it that went out of their way to separate itself from any form of Femdom that placed an emphasis on kink (with the exceptions of domestic discipline or chastity) or sexual aspects (with the exception of PIV sexual intercourse or cunnilingus).

    I find this split to be odd as it steers away from the idea of “finding what works for you,” and tries to pigeon-hole ideas as being acceptable or unacceptable within a fixed framework. Thankfully, WordPress seems to have far fewer people that take a hard-line stance on these definitions. The community is more into that and the interactions on some of the blogs regularly turn toxic.

    I am of the belief that people should engage in Femdom/FLR because it makes both party happy and fulfilled. That can take a variety of forms and each couple will find their form that resonates with them.

    Also, just for the record, but I think it is way more dominant for you to dress comfortably in whatever way you want to 🙂
    I have never come across a couple in a long-term relationship or marriage where the Domme dressed in fetish attire on anything beyond special occasions.

    Blogs are a lot harder to come across now that Google has changed its SEO optimizations and search parameters for blogs (e.g. it tends to bury older blog posts and posts of similar subjects on the same blog and the WordPress search function also buries older posts). If you are hunting for some I would suggest using an alternate search engine that doesn’t use advertising money-based priority sorting, e.g. (or even bing or yahoo will pull up more blogs than google).

    Take care.

    Liked by 4 people

    1. Hi Fur, thank you for reading and commenting:
      You have mentioned this before, thank you for your always fresh and accurate assessment of this topic.
      I have written about my struggles with understanding who I am and what we are doing here, your explanations have been very enlightening. I have a much better idea now where I fit in..
      I have been lucky enough to have some apparently new to this life style comment lately so I felt I needed to say something about 24/7.

      Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you Michael for reading and commenting:

      Thank you for letting me know we are not alone, I could not imagine every time I wanted sex I would need to get on some latex. I have nothing against it however.
      Its crazy but I don’t know how he could ever be more horny than he already is just serving me.

      Just this morning I was getting ready for a shower and was looking and commenting on how I need to loose some weight and rubbing my belly. He came up from behind (with no penis stimulation) just the sight of me, his cock sticking straight out with a full on hard-on, kissed me on the neck while holding me tight telling me how beautiful I am.

      It seems our men can not get enough of us.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. D, Happy New Year! Hope 2018 will bring much joy and happiness to you and your husband.

    I think femdom/FLR means different things to each individual/couple, as long as it works for the couple. People are different, and their preference for kink are likely to be as well. For my Domme and I, we don’t distinguish the diff between femdom and FLR as long as it serves our purpose, which is to make our marriage stronger and happier. We learn from blogs, such as yours, to see what additional positives we can incorporate into our lives. Some of the activities totally resonate with us and we strive to incorporate them while others seem more distant to our preferences. However, the one thing you said that definitely resonates with us is that, the objective is for me to satisfy/pamper/worship my Domme, and as a byproduct I get satisfied from my Domme being satisfied – this creates a virtuous cycle that keeps us motivated to continue the lifestyle and keeps us intimate, much more so than when we were in a vanilla relationship. That is the great thing abt femdom, and why we are drawn to it.

    Also, my Domme does not need to dress up for me to crave her. As the years go by, she has become more attractive to me and I can’t keep my lips away from her womanhood, ass and feet 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

      1. Thanks D. I dont think I will be starting a blog any time soon – not a prolific writer like you and our FLR life is not nearly as abundant as your. But I do very much enjoy reading your blog and will add comments when I have something to contribute. Keep up the excellent blog!


  3. I am just so glad I came across your blog. Blogs that speak to the actual, everyday reality of being people while living in a Female Dominant/male submissive lifestyle is rare, but like most things rare …. when you find it is like Gold!

    This post is the only post I’ve read so far, but I know I am going to love “binge reading” this.

    Thank you


    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi subhub, thank you for reading my blog:
      I agree there are very few; in fact I have only found a few which deal with or write about normal life.
      I am going to try to focus this month or so on the day in and day out Wife life. I think I focused too much on my sexual rewards this last year..

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Your thoughts seem to mirror my relationship with my wife. Initially, she felt it was not appropriate to use sex as a tool. Now she is beginning to see how it can be used to motivate me in accomplishing may things around the house…. and I am happy to do it for her.
    I am not one for labels. I searched quite a bit and read a bunch of blogs to find ones I relate to. Initially, many I found had some things I could relate to but then they did other things that didn’t feel right to me.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Herwish, thank you for reading and replying.
      I know, it was hard in the beginning as a Wife. We are not raised or taught that this is appropriate.
      When he came to me with his desire for my leadership I did a lot research and started using this control. It was sort of a trial and error process actually over a few years to fine tune it. One of my favorite scenes I believe, one of them anyway is to push this to the limit and have him cum in his own mouth. It makes the circle complete.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. My wife is not into research too much but she is open to my suggestion and if she likes it, it sticks. I offer lots of things and role with what she likes. Having me cum in my mouth went over well with her and yesterday she had me cum on a spoon and fed it to me. That she really enjoyed. I will be making a blog entry about that one soon.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Herwish, thank you for Commenting and sharing your life with me.
      I think it is wonderful that you are willing to consume your own semen. I feel this is a major step in your life as a sub. If you cannot fully submit to your wife you will not serve Her to your full capacity.

      This actually took quite a long time for my husband to be able to do this. I had to recondition his mind, it seems a normal man is not able to do it. As much as he says he will, once he cums he changes his mind.

      Every so often I make him swallow his full load directly from his cock as I talked about a few blogs and comments ago, just to keep his mind focused on my Dominance. He has absolutely no hesitation any more.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You’re welcome, and thank you for your comments and insight. I laughed reading the part about your husband changing his mind after cumming. I did the same thing. It all sounded great when you were sexually charged but after being deflated it was not nearly as appealing. I think this is relevant to all things pre and post male orgasm. I see the cum eating now as a way to show I will follow through with what is required of me after the desire to do it is gone.


        1. Thank you Herwish, thanks for replying.
          I so agree with your perspective on this issue. My husband was like any other male. I broke him though. It was necessary for his submission. I had a lot of work to do in the beginning but it really paid off for our family, he is a better man now.
          BTW my friend has an awesome blog, if you check it out, Her and her husband did a lot of research on why the male mind switches after orgasm. Here is a link, it really helped me to see what was happening. She also taught Her husband to consume his semen. He is not a sub.

          Liked by 1 person

          1. Thanks and I have visited Mel & Paul’s blog after seeing some comments from her on yours. I do enjoy her perspective as well. It is also very relatable to me.
            Side Note: I see you dropped the “Almost” from your title 🙂


            1. Either way works. “Almost” implies your not quite where your could be and your husband has more coming… even if you are very femdom. It’s wicked either way 🙂

              Liked by 1 person

            2. Thanks Herwish, this is why I enjoy the interaction of the comment section.
              You are right, I like it and is actually very accurate I believe for our relationship. We are always learning, I don’t know what I am doing exactly compared to a Pro I just do what feels right and those feelings do change, I may change it back.. Thank You!

              Liked by 1 person

            3. I enjoy the comments as well but my time on the computer for the blog and recreational things is limited so I don’t always get to things right away.
              I do try to stop in on your blog once a week thou as I like reading what you have. 🙂


  6. My Mistress/ partner entered us into a Femdom/ feminization relationship in July of 2015 we’d been engaged for a year. I’m naturally submissive, she’s very dominant. We married last July 17 . In the 2 plus yrs in the lifestyle I am now well trained to service her every need, whim. I do all housework, etc. I’m required to be dressed as Stephie while in the home and away from town. I found I loved the humiliation, emasculation, the teachings of Femdom. This was her idea unlike most it seems to be the males idea. Chastity also helped out a lot in my training.


    1. Hi sissy:
      I think it’s wonderful you found a Woman to serve. I honestly feel all Women would benefit from understanding how to control and address the needs of their man while in turn benefiting her and her needs and desires. Although we do not practice fully your Femdom methods I fully embrace them and am very happy you are serving your wife’s every need. I know with my sub I continually need and want more from him. I hope you can keep her satisfied.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Thank you Ms.Dorinda I will always work as hard as I can to serve my Mistress/partner in every way I have been trained to follow the rules of Femdom well. I work some part time but Mistress is a professional dominant woman. I am her housewife! She stresses that I keep up my feminine routine at all times! It’s hard sometimes but I try to always look pretty when she gets home from work!


  8. Thank you for your blog and for sharing your thoughts and insights to your lifestyle. My partner and I are new to the lifestyle and trying to sort it all out. From what I’ve read in your posts, I would like to think I’m a lot like your husband. I do 95% of the household chores, I earn the paycheck, and live my life with the purpose of making her happiness as my #1 priority.

    Where I struggle a bit is seeing you two have an intimate life together. Although he has not cum in awhile, he still pleasures you sexually. Have you ever had a time in your marriage where you were not interested in sex or anything to do with sexual activity? My partner is 7 years older than me, and is in the middle of menopause. She says she doesn’t have any sex drive or sexual interest. As a result, we haven’t had sex for nearly two years.

    While I try to focus on taking care of her, and making her life simple, it’s hard to feel neglected. It feels she is often indifferent to my submission and efforts to make her happy.

    Again, we are very new to this lifestyle…one year this month, when we first learned about an FLR, which then introduced us to Femdom. I’m not sure she is as dominate as she says she is. I often feel I’m living my own world of fantasy and submission. I’m wondering if you have ever had this in your relationship? Any advice you can give us would be greatly appreciated. I’ve read probably read over a hundred books, blogs, articles, etc. I’ve learned there is a wide spectrum of opinions and thoughts to this lifestyle. We just need to find what works for us. But again, I’m not sure how to feel about the lack of sexual energy or attention. I’m not asking to have sex, or even cum. But wondering if it’s wrong for me to want any intimacy at all? Or am I being a selfish sub? Thank you again for all your blogs and for sharing parts of your life with us. I hope you continue to share. All the best to you and your sub. Chris.

    Liked by 2 people

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